This blog was my self-reflection journey taken to heal from any perceived open childhood wounds, my ‘new’ divorce and my lonely role as 'mother' and 'woman'. Writing and sharing with this community of bloggers has helped me heal through pain, depression and loneliness. I am now focused on being more present with my life and... Continue Reading →
“Time is the substance I am made of. Time is a river which sweeps me along, but I am the river; it is a tiger which destroys me, but I am the tiger; it is a fire which consumes me, but I am the fire... ~ Jorge Luis Borges
The point of a maze is to find its center. The point of a labyrinth is to find your center. ~ Unknown
“The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.” ― George Orwell
“For attractive lips, speak words of kindness. For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people. For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry. For beautiful hair, let a child run his fingers through it once a day. For poise, walk with the knowledge you’ll never walk alone. ... We leave you a tradition with a future. The tender loving care of human beings will never become obsolete. People even more than things have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed and redeemed and redeemed and redeemed. Never throw out anybody. Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you’ll find one at the end of your arm. As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands: one for helping yourself, the other for helping others. Your “good old days” are still ahead of you, may you have many of them.” ― Sam Levenson
“I do not want to be the leader. I refuse to be the leader. I want to live darkly and richly in my femaleness. I want a man lying over me, always over me. His will, his pleasure, his desire, his life, his work, his sexuality the touchstone, the command, my pivot. I don’t mind working, holding my ground intellectually, artistically; but as a woman, oh, God, as a woman I want to be dominated. I don’t mind being told to stand on my own feet, not to cling, be all that I am capable of doing, but I am going to be pursued, fucked, possessed by the will of a male at his time, his bidding.” ― Anaïs Nin
“Anger is just anger. It isn't good. It isn't bad. It just is. What you do with it is what matters. It's like anything else. You can use it to build or to destroy. You just have to make the choice." Constructive anger," the demon said, her voice dripping sarcasm. Also known as passion," I said quietly. "Passion has overthrown tyrants and freed prisoners and slaves. Passion has brought justice where there was savagery. Passion has created freedom where there was nothing but fear. Passion has helped souls rise from the ashes of their horrible lives and build something better, stronger, more beautiful.” ― Jim Butcher
“Nobody sees anybody truly but all through the flaws of their own egos. That is the way we all see ...each other in life. Vanity, fear, desire, competition-- all such distortions within our own egos-- condition our vision of those in relation to us. Add to those distortions to our own egos the corresponding distortions in the egos of others, and you see how cloudy the glass must become through which we look at each other. That's how it is in all living relationships except when there is that rare case of two people who love intensely enough to burn through all those layers of opacity and see each other's naked hearts.” ― Tennessee Williams
“Whosoever is delighted in solitude, is either a wild beast or a god.” ~ Aristotle
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.” ― Charles Dickens
“Drinking is an emotional thing. It joggles you out of the standardism of everyday life, out of everything being the same. It yanks you out of your body and your mind and throws you against the wall. I have the feeling that drinking is a form of suicide where you're allowed to return to life and begin all over the next day. It's like killing yourself, and then you're reborn. I guess I've lived about ten or fifteen thousand lives now.” ― Charles Bukowski
“She was a genius of sadness, immersing herself in it, separating its numerous strands, appreciating its subtle nuances. She was a prism through which sadness could be divided into its infinite spectrum.” ― Jonathan Safran Foer
“In every crowd are certain persons who seem just like the rest, yet they bear amazing messages.” ― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
Kill one man, and you are a murderer. Kill millions of men, and you are a conqueror. Kill them all, and you are a god. ~ Jean Rostand
“Let's tell the truth to people. When people ask, 'How are you?' have the nerve sometimes to answer truthfully. You must know, however, that people will start avaoiding you because, they, too, have knees that pain them and heads that hurt and they don't want to know about yours. But think of it this way: If people avoid you, you will have more time to meditate and do fine research on a cure for whatever truly afflicts you.” ― Maya Angelou
"Cyclops, you ask my honorable name. Remember the gift you promised me, and I shall tell you. my name is Nohbdy: mother father and friends, everyone calls me Nohbdy."
Parasites are not only incredibly diverse; they are also incredibly successful. There are parasitic stretches of DNA in your own genes, some of which are called retrotransposons. Many of the parasitic stretches were originally viruses that entered our DNA. Most of them don't do us any harm. They just copy and insert themselves in other parts of our DNA, basically replicating themselves. Sometimes they hop into other species and replicate themselves in a new host. According to one estimate, roughly one-third to one-half of all human DNA is basically parasitic. ~ Carl Zimmer
A whole army, though they can neither write nor read, are not afraid of a platform, which they know is but earth or stone; nor of a cannon, which, without a hand to give fire to it, is but cold iron; therefore a whole army is afraid of one man. ~ J. Harrington
Nil illegitimi carborundum
“Don't you find it odd," she continued, "that when you're a kid, everyone, all the world, encourages you to follow your dreams. But when you're older, somehow they act offended if you even try.” ― Ethan Hawke
“Sometimes, reaching out and taking someone's hand is the beginning of a journey. At other times, it is allowing another to take yours.” ― Vera Nazarian
Alchemy is the art of manipulating life, and consciousness in matter, to help it evolve, or to solve problems of inner disharmonies. - Jean Dubuis
“The loneliest moment in someone’s life is when they are watching their whole world fall apart, and all they can do is stare blankly.” ― F. Scott Fitzgerald
"When you stop learning, stop listening, stop looking and asking questions, always new questions, then it is time to die." ~ Lillian Smith
“Dream delivers us to dream, and there is no end to illusion. Life is like a train of moods like a string of beads, and, as we pass through them, they prove to be many-colored lenses which paint the world their own hue. . . . ” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson
"When our individual life force enters our fetal body, the moment in which we become truly human, it passes through the pineal and triggers the first primordial flood of DMT. Later, at birth, the pineal releases more DMT. As we die, the life-force leaves the body through the pineal gland, releasing another flood of this psychedelic spirit molecule." ~ Rick Strassman
“You save yourself or you remain unsaved.” ~ Alice Sebold
No bars can ever imprison your heart.
... one can live in peace and still die by sword.
The most useful piece of learning for the uses of life is to unlearn what is untrue. Antisthenes
Have I reflected enough, too little, too much?
Still working on shielding...
Beautiful Harmonious Resonance!
Communicable Disease Notice
I close my eyes.
I never understood the cruelty.
...my heart and my pen remain my truest voice.
...I do not know if I can react without taking his life.
...I am not as alone as I feel.
Frantic beings we do become without them.
I am officially one.
...my tears wish to fall into the calling of the bottle.
Over time my anger transmuted to shame.
...marriage and divorce are both beginnings and endings...
This was a story line whose repeating incidence could not be coincidence.
Closed doors are always a blessing ...
I had never walked in on the aftermath.
I do not want to hear what I feel.
...something truly unique is brewing...
There are no solitary drops of rain.
...my powerlessness was erased by the control of intake...
My purpose and passion have changed.
We were born to explore and create.
You are the quintessence of beauty.
From as far back as I can remember, she hated me.
In this snowfall I am cold...
My exhaustion was begging me to surrender.
How long have you been overweight?
My misery does not love company...
21st Century Psychology
I asked for help to find a specific color of muteness.
I miss the lightness of my hands and heart.
...yes, no and maybe can mean the same thing, unless I replace 'maybe' with 'herpes'.
Love ~ Peace ~ Freedom
All mothers are multilingual.
...we’re all walking Band-Aids.
Find your weeds.
...a silent impromptu cadenza with no audience.
In the end shall be the beginning...
...something is amiss.
"Never underestimate the ruthlessness of the ego to keep you in a state of suffering in which you voluntarily participate." Iyanla Vanzant
...loyalty to ideals vs. loyalty to realities.
...the self must assuage the self.
he continues his struggle to take a breath...
Truth hidden within names.
Each step numbered.
Was it a matrix moment?
...expect in return.
Do not thin yourself...
...don't give up.
...the right door was opened for you.
I am dying.
Money is neither armor nor salve for the inner and outer battles and wounds we endure.
Cups runneth over...
I pity the fool.
Where is your emotion?!
If we win a million, will you get back together with Dad?
...there's no place like home...
We are all healers.
...what did my child self see in him and love?
...in self-defense I shot the man.
My mind is cocked and loaded.
Every doctor was wrong...
Let your light shine.
His whispers had become unavoidable shouts.
This journey demands breaks, falls, scrapes and bruises.
I was able to fulfill my lifelong dream of going to space.
...spiritual illiteracy sometimes takes a hold of all of us and requires that we perform a makeover within or suffer forever without.
...the separation of thought and emotion is what some people need.
...the death I long to surrender to, escapes me.
...felt I needed to live a life in exact opposite to all that I witnessed.
Bullies truly are afraid deep down inside.
I'm not an MD but sometimes doctor mom can diagnose in a way no MD can.
Please don' sell me Massa!
I miss that little boy and still see him in that man.
When I decided to marry, it was a cerebral decision.
I've got a checkmate mentality with a stalemate reality.
... they did not prepare me for what I would see.
... what other realities had she experienced?
...he would sometimes hold the muzzle of a shotgun to her head and threaten to pull the trigger.
The classification is a box. Keep box cutters on hand.
“For whatever we lose (like a you or a me), It's always our self we find in the sea.” ― E.E. Cummings
I named him Nathan. Today, he would be 17 years old.
...instead of explaining, he stalled the plane.
...angry at the asphyxiation suffered at silence while trying to breath in affection.
... it was too late, a backdraft was in progress.
...would sit under her living room table for hours at a time, feeling out of sorts but hidden and safe.
...what we choose to align our energy with will yield to us the result of its fruit.
...there may always exist a misted and ethereal sorrow that may not be muted but in death.
...extremities last receiving flow - holding hands watch you go...
...examine hand holding as a tool of emotional, physical and spiritual communication.
… there is no need to keep the gold in the furnace once all of the dross has fallen away.
We are all impoverished.
...sitting atop pyramids of gold.
He held my hand and comforted me.
comforted. loved. in absence of wanting.
I cried for her... her soul ascended.
I watched him punch, kick and spit on you.