on speaking and silence
I don’t know what I’m doing but it’s important to appear as if I do, most of the time anyways. Wearing a suit and makeup is sometimes all it takes. Some days however I actually need to talk about what I know. All bets are off on those days.
Unfortunately there is a freeway in my mind that usually has three answers for all questions and often tries to expressway them into one. The result is that yes, no and maybe can mean the same thing, unless I replace ‘maybe’ with ‘herpes’. Credibility and sanity then become valid concerns, especially if the question is, “Would you like some coffee”?
Tried talking slowly to help the roads converge. This only prolongs the same answer(s), which is ultimately met with blank stares, including my own and followed up quickly by cover up smiles, from the listeners.
Tried Toastmasters. There was never enough time to filter my thoughts, so, odd looks before a round of applause became the norm. Reminded me of little league and how all players gets trophies. Well, some players should definitely not get trophies.
Tried one-on-one coaching. My speech coach reached out his hand to touch my chest above my left breast and said,
“Your problem is that you are talking and anticipating the reactions and responses at the same time. Instead, talk from here.”
I know he meant my heart but also thought he should have kept his hands to himself. That’s a long sentence to say with palm placement over your pledge of allegiance space. So, that was my only one-on-one.
‘Pledge of allegiance’ coach was right though.
Speaking from your heart is the most authentic and effective way to communicate, followed closely by silence…