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Unlearning and Fitting In


Nosy and uninvolved family members and acquaintances thought I was nuts. The repeated mantra was, “Your child won’t be socialized and will be an outcast.”

Who’s to say sending them to public or private school would socialize them and make them an incast?  Why did they think this is what I should aim for and when did this become the standard?

I didn’t know anyone that had homeschooled nor did I have any support to go down that path. I had only researched, attended conferences and studied its benefits. Even my husband at the time needed convincing.


Here are some reasons I wanted to homeschool:

  • To establish a strong foundation of faith [not religious]
  • To further deepen and strengthen family bonds, their main support system
  • To teach them to use that faith to hear and listen to their heart and mind
  • To teach them to follow their instincts in relation to learning and exploring
  • To teach them to question everything. Every-thing, Every-one and Every-doctrine
  • To teach the connectedness of humanity and their responsibility
  • To teach them their ABC’s and 123’s. The easier stuff.

It isn’t necessary to homeschool to teach these points.  I’m not purporting it’s the right thing for all families. I just felt a strong desire to do it this way and was only able to do it for a short time.

I continue to work to teach all the same values while my children attend public schools but it is more complicated under the influence of a tried and true system of regurgitated information that often goes unquestioned.  The history book is just that. A book.  The child needs to understand that although he can get an ‘A’ for knowing and understanding the story, that it is just that. A story.

I struggle with proving that truth requires a deeper look than what is being fed and rarely it will be in the books they were given.

homeschooler envy.jpg
My kids sometimes forget to wear underwear and sometimes they cuss.  Yup, they actually say ‘Fuck’ sometimes. It’s not a ‘Fuck-free’ world after all.

All said, education still begins at home and the parents, caregivers, etc., are responsible for planting the values they hope that child might use as the foundation point for their BASE jump in the world as an adult. It is not the responsibility of the ‘system’ to do this.

If you don’t step in and teach your child about how to hear and so use their unique gifts and talents, you may find that the child excited about their hand-traced turkey purposed to look like every other hand-traced turkey, doesn’t seek to bring forth the creations of his or her heart and mind, the ones that can change the world.

In fact, they may be become so ‘socialized’ that creating or questioning the possibility of making anything outside of that turkey and being different might instill fear and shame.

be you.gif

Encourage inquiry and the exploration of stepping outside of and breaking apart the boxes. Reassure them they need not stand inside or fit in to ‘Be’.




  1. I AM HUGGGIIINNGGG YOUUUUUUUU!!!!! I am a homeschooling mom too!!! I am so happy that you were able to see the benefits of it. I get the whole socialization crap, uh no, sorry…the whole socialization argument based in conditioned ignorance. My children do not have any special needs other than the strengthening of self-assurance and autonomy. Perhaps presenting that as a downplay is contradictory on my part. Those aspects of one’s being are very necessary. I have just been made aware of my own misstep right this very minute. Thank you for that 💖 Emotional Intelligence, as it is now popular to say, is what has fallen away from our society. I feel the shift happening towards balance again, slow as its movement may seem. You truly are making my day quite uplifting and full of exciting connection and alignment. Did I say, Thank You, already? 🤗🤗🤗

    Liked by 1 person

  2. TRICIA!!! I feel the love 🙂
    I think my mother groove was best met when homeschooling – I loved loved loved it!
    And I agree – the assurance, autonomy and confidence they gain is priceless.
    Oh how I love synchronicity 🙂
    Thank you so much for your beautiful energy here.
    You’re welcome & I look forward to reading more of your work also 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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